As your initiation into knighthood is scheduled for tomorrow, I wanted to review your training and accomplishments to date.
You have exhibited various displays of cunning from the beginning of our acquaintance. Pole dancing demonstrates your ability to climb and twist as needed to escape our enemies. You demonstrated good backkicking skills with the bunny angel. Your attacks on your octopus ball demonstrate the ferociousness of your instincts.
Additionally, you have survived the Forest of Legs, the absence of your human and a visit from two younger feline.
All of this demonstrates your ability to exhibit the character trait and skills necessary to becoming a knight.
However, we are dismayed at your comment that humans bleed easily. Practicing on your human goes against our code of chivalry in which we protect those weak among us (as long as they are not dogs or rodents), Such a lapse in judgment causes us concern. We are hoping it was a lapse in judgement on seeing the beautiful accoutrement sent to you for your training and initiation.
Please report how you plan to curb such instincts in the future and submit one piece of information gathered while surviving the Forest of Legs as your final exam.
Sir Ambassador Scout Ringo